the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
