Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
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Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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