Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Randomize
