His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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