remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
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my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
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I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Life without a bra equals bliss.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"