i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Every concussion has its silver lining
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.