he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
My vagina just clenched in fear
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
