I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
