I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
