So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
