I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
