I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
