You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
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