Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize