I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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