I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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