It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
we're so committed to being not committed
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
