he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Oh god it's open bar.
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