What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Even my vagina gasped.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
