the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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