their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Randomize
