I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Randomize
