Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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