YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize