We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
