There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize