This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
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Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
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It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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