Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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