Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize
