I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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