Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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