Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
