It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
So many bounce houses so little time
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Randomize
