just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
