quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize