goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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