i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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