I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
false alarm. still invincible.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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