Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
