i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
