She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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