Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
