Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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