would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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