i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
