I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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