it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
