I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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