New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
The feeling are messing with the penis
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
