So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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