Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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